Compulsive Reader (55 words, gen B7)

If you appear to be reading, non-readers avoid you like the plague. On the London it's the only way to get anything resembling privacy.

So here I sit, perusing a scrap of paper dropped by a guard outside the holding cell. "Why does a giraffe have a long neck?"

What the hell is a giraffe?

The Long and the Short of it (B7 gen, 55 words)

Avon gingerly laid down the dead mouse, noting on the Official Aquatar Failure Form, "25 gramme test subject. Dead on arrival."

On to the next: "1300 kilogram test subject. Dead on arrival."

As Avon loaded the giraffe onto the forklift, he decided it was time for a career move to banking. Paperwork was much cleaner.

Fate is agin me.

I thought I'd have a nice lie-in, sleep maybe until 10 ack emma & arise refreshed & fit to do some real work.
( I'm sure you can see where this is going )

*Yay* I found the medicine I need.

Rooting through the paperpile, underneath a bunch of printouts on phrenology, I found the invoice from March 2004. It's Maalox Plus Tablets. In the US they make a variety of Maalox products, but the closest I could find was either a horrid liquid, or a children's version of the tablets. I googled on the off-chance I'd find it somewhere cheaper/closer than the company I'd bought it from last time, but the only other ones I found were in Manchester- one wouldn't sell to the general public at all, and the other only sold within England. So back I went to westons.com based in West Sussex. It'll prob. be a month before I get them. I'm looking forward to being able to eat the occasional onion. :^)

Big Project, Small Universe (B7 Gen fic, 55 words)

"That's graph paper, not giraffe paper."

"You should have told me earlier, Avon!" Vila shook his cramping fingers. "I've been drawing in all the little giraffes for hours!"

"You were awake throughout your entire watch? Amazing."

Vila grinned and told Orac to send a scan of his 1,000 giraffes to the Delta Billion Giraffe Project.

Looks good on Paper (B7 Gen, 55 words) Alas. No giraffe

"But Blake, millions will die!" Cally protested.

"I don't have any choice." Blake pulled out his 'Federation Dungeonmaster Rulebook'. "Territories Operating under the Shadow of Oppression shall be considered Enemy Territories and Allowed No Mercy."

"That's it for my battalion of Class Five Delta troopers, then," Vila said glumly.

Avon said, "My hackers are deserting."


(I had a nap and woke up with Blake making a statement about 'Territories Under the Shadow of Oppression'.)